“I think you’re cute and I want to know more about you.”

So often, conversations between cute women and interested guys are filled with useless crap.

Crap about the weather, about some celebrity, about some relevant news topic, all designed to skirt around what he’s really thinking and what she already knows:

“I think you’re cute and I want to know more about you.”

Avoiding it and disguising it isn’t serving anyone.

You talk about things you don’t really care about, get stuck in your head trying to hide your anxiety, and ultimately end up failing because you don’t pay attention to what she’s really saying and so miss all her cues.

Worse than that, you’re wasting very precious moments of your life that you could spend being more real, more honest, more fulfilled, and more satisfied.

Also, she get’s to be part of a conversation with someone who had no real interest in what he’s staying and is spending more time stuck in his head trying to disguise he real feelings and thoughts so she doesn’t find out.

No-one wins.

Why do people do it? There are many reasons, but most of them revolve around one thing:

Guys want to feel happy, fulfilled, strong, powerful, and confident and they think that holding back what they’re thinking is the way to do it.

– “If I don’t state my interest, she’ll never reject me.”

– “If I don’t express myself, no-one will have the chance to ridicule me.”

– “If I can show her how great I am before she knows I’m interested, she’s the one who’s going to have to chase me.”

Of course, whilst these reasons seem obvious on the surface, they’re woefully inadequate when you start to dig.

– If you don’t state your interest, there’s a better than even chance that she’s never going to know you’re attracted to her and you’ll end up in the friend zone.

– If you don’t express yourself and put yourself out there, you’ll never end up doing anything remotely rewarding and become increasingly dissatisfied with your life, regardless of how many women are in it.

– Showing women how great you are involves putting yourself out there, living your life on your terms, saying what you truly believe, and having the courage to push through fears – none of which you’re going to do by hiding behind your lies.

The problem here isn’t what you want to achieve, it’s how you’re going about it.

The solution?

“I think you’re cute and I want to know more about you.”

Yes, she may reject you but at least you won’t spend months, if not years of your life, chasing this girl who has never thought of you as anything more than a friend.

Yes, other people may ridicule you but if you follow through with this, you’ll end up living a rewarding and fulfilling life, meaning you won’t care if people ridicule you.

Yes, you may be the one in the position of chasing her but at least you’ll be the kind of Man she wants chasing her, rather than a little boy who she can’t stand being near.

More often than not, the most obvious solution is also the most powerful solution.

If you have the balls to take it.

Now, I’m not saying that you can’t learn a huge amount about her passions, her desires, her loves, and her fears by talking about the weather or the latest celebrity scandal.

Even the most banal topics will give you an opportunity to discover more about what’s under the surface.

What I saying is that if you have those conversations whilst trying to disguise what you really want to say, all you’re doing is setting yourself up for failure.

So, next time you find yourself in one of those conversations where there’s something you really want to say, but haven’t said it yet, take some time to consider what’s the most effective way of getting what you want and then follow that path.

16 thoughts on ““I think you’re cute and I want to know more about you.””

  1. I gotta say this – it’s solid. Says goodbye to “doing X, Y, Z = get girl” and hello to creating the Man within who deserves her beauty while simultaneously creating the Woman inside her who deserves your Greatness. No chasing or “she has power” crap either, it’s two independent powerful forces connecting.

    I should kickstart a blog on here soon. Just need to handle the ol’ writer’s block and turn it into my advantage.

    Reply
  2. Leigh you are a gift for men and women, because you help to be more real, and for consecuence these give more love, and more women in the world now are loved…

    Reply
  3. This is gold!

    I should express my true interest right of the bat because at worst she will at least think I’m a real man and reject me and at best she will love it.

    Also, none of this asking for directions and then saying she’s cute as well.

    Going to gym and buying CD’s tomorrow at the mall. Hopefully I can have some fun with girls. 😉

    Reply
  4. Hey Leigh.

    I think I have understood something that I am doing wrong.

    I have approached some girls but they seem to lose interest in a short space of time.
    Could it be, that if you are attracted to a girl and approach her and start talking mundane stuff instead of expressing your romantic intentions, they get bored quickly?

    I swear there was this girl in class a few weeks ago, I liked, but after 2 conversations, she started avoiding me even though she was eager the first few times. I talked to her a lot but never expressed my intentions and hence was being a “false friend” and creeped her.

    Shame she looked like Candice Swanepoel. 😉

    Reply
    • Could be mate. Hard to say without talking to you or seeing you interact with the girls you’re talking about but it’s a definite possibility.

      How do you feel when you’re talking to someone and you can tell they have a hidden agenda? Do you think she could be feeling the same thing?

      Reply
      • I feel weird and sleazed out when people talk to me hiding an agenda.

        Girls probably pick this up more and will get creeped. It’s dishonest anyway so yeah I think expressing interest is honest and the decent thing to do. Especially if you approach the girl then you should be honest.

        Thanks man. Gold advice.

        Reply

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